She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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