New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
