I wish I could punch you in the face.
Can i not drive my cunt home
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
