If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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