I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
