Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
My vagina is officially offended.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
