I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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