After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
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Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
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passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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