The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
