me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
