Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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