So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
