This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize