How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
