I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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