if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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