if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize