It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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