So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Less talking, more tequila
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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