we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize