You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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