Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize