ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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