He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
