It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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