I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
