What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
