Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize