so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Say something about gay babies.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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