HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
