question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
