life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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