Nicole vs. Life
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
