I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
