I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
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MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
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It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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