By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
