Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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