Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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