Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
