she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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