Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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