I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize