The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
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The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
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That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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