what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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