So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
