At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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