So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
