last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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