Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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