Screwed.edu
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
3 2 1 whiskey
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
The ass gains better be worth it
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